Sep 2

Sep 2 How to Hear Your Intuition (even when your mind won't shut the f up)

This one time, I moved to Spain because I thought it was what my intuition wanted me to do.

Turns out, it was my ego. And I was miserable there.

This other time, I went to Peru even though I was scared shitless and thought I was making a terrible mistake leaving behind my toddler (and two businesses) for a month.

Turns out, it was my intuition. And it blew open the doors of my life.

So how can we tell the difference between 'intuition' and 'ego' BEFORE we make the life-altering move [or even chose what to have for dinner]?

I mean, of course, it's easy enough to hear our intuition when she’s super clear (Hello, Steffie? It’s me, your higher self calling).

But what about when your receiver seems to be picking up mixed signals between the two callers jockeying for the phone.

==> The ego, which is loud, punishing, and fickle, and operates in the mind.

==> The intuition, which is patient, cheeky, and persistent, and operates in the heart.

Here’s the thing when it comes to discerning between the two: the ego is very, very tricky.

The ego knows how to mimic the intuition to lead you right back where it wants you: ‘safety’ (which to the ego means stuck and small; watching life go by, instead of actually living it: on the stands, not in the game).

Now, there’s nothing wrong with the ego; it serves a sound purpose when it is in ‘right use’ and protects us from doing really stupid shit. It’s just that it has become a distorted survival mechanism gone wild.

Read on, and you will never fall prey to that ego’s pesky static again (and you’ll always be able to hear Your Truth above the noise).

But, first, I need to get you up to speed on my terminology (if you’ve been following me for a while, this will be a review):

The Earth Plane - A virtual reality game we chose to come play to experience duality on behalf of the universe. A game that only the bravest come play because it causes us to forget that we are Spiritual Beings. We start off consumed by the game. It is riveting and its illusions are powerful. It looks so real. As we advance in levels - like octaves on a spiral - we get closer and closer to our God self (which is Who We Really Are) through a pealing back of the veils and a process known as ascension. The only goal of this Earth game is ‘to create for the sake of creating’ (to experience the same joy as when our our creator created us), but we forget that is the goal because the game tricks us into thinking the goal is what the other game players tell us it is. So, in essence, the goal is to remember the REAL goal. :) Once we do, we have mastery over the game and have so. much. fun. playing it.
Your Hero’s Journey - The level of the game where you begin to wake up to your True Self and what you really came here to do, and the life you came here to live (authentic, self-expressed, creative, on purpose, mission-driven, connected).
The Holy Grail - Your core creative energy and a life that is 100% authentically you, which results in the freedom, joy, and abundance you were born to have because you are Spirit’s sacred child. Once this happens FULLY, you leave the earth game into a higher dimension.
The Joy Meter - The compass also known as your ‘intuition’ that leads you perfectly on your journey to The Holy Grail; it lives in the heart. When something is for you, it blooms open like a rose, when it is not, it constricts into a tight little bud. This is how Spirit speaks to you, and it is the realm of your desire. It will always lead you on your highest path, down the road of your true hero’s journey (lit up, shored up, aligned, playful, and powerful)
The Fear Dragons - The opponents on your journey; also known as the ‘ego’. They try to snap at you with vicious mean fire-breathing threats that make you want to run back to safety and go back to sleep lost in the earthly illusions. They make you take the game wayyyy too seriously. The important thing to know is THEY ARE NOT REAL. This is the nature of the duality we chose to come experience. Not to worry: the higher self always prevails. And also, the dragons are mastered not by being rejected but by being accepted. They are meant to be seen for what they are, that is how they become neutral and lose their power over you (but they don’t technically ‘go away’). Our super power is giving them space; once we do, they can hop in the back seat of your chariot and cheer you on as you drive with just a periodic bark from the backseat here and there when they need a snack or a nap.

So - now that we have the baseline established - this blog is specifically focused on Your Joy Meter. And, even more specifically:

How To Read Your Joy Meter So You Can Reach Your Holy Grail Without Suffering (especially when the fear dragons are running energetic interference on the readings of your compass)

First, here are the ATTRIBUTES OF THE JOY METER

Operates on a scale from 0 to 10 (10 being the ‘choices’ that are most FOR you and lead you on your journey; 0 being the ‘decisions’ that keep you stuck, or trick you into going backwards)
Anything from a ‘5’ to a ‘10’ is higher self. This is the realm of ‘choice’ and it comes from the heart. This is Spirit speaking to you and through you. Choice is always based in the present.
Anything from a ‘0’ to a ‘5’ is ego. This is the realm of ‘decision’ and it comes from the mind. It is always based on conditioning and patterning. This is where the dragons operate. Decision is always based on the past or the future.

Ok, now, HOW TO READ IT (it’s all based on FEELING, or what I like to call ‘felt-sense’ in the body; but “logic” will try to hijack this process with ‘pro/con’ lists. Ignore it):

7.5 to 10
- Felt-Sense: Exhilarating, Fuck Yes, Scary, Overwhelming, Expansive, Alive, Uncomfortable (because it’s expanding you beyond your comfort zones), Hot/Sweaty Resistance
- Leads To: Alignment, Power, Boundlessness, Expression, Authenticity
- Tips: Just because you are afraid, it doesn’t make this choice ‘wrong’. The fear isn’t going anywhere. The invitation is to look that fear dragon dead in the eye, give it a hug, and then do the damn thing anyway. Your ego uses fear as a weapon to try to get you to avoid making these choices to keep you stuck (it’s masochistic version of “safe”).
- EXAMPLES OF 10’s: starting a new business, setting a boundary, working with a new teacher who provokes your edges, my trip to Peru
5 to 7.5
- Felt-Sense: Commitment, Devotion, Discipline, Intention, Wisdom, Knowing
- Leads to: Fulfillment, Satisfaction
- Tips: With these choices, your ego will try to tell you that you are ‘restricting’ yourself to get you to blow it off. You’re not restricting yourself, you are choosing yourself. Freedom lives here.
- EXAMPLES of 7.5’s: working out, abstaining from addictions, daily spiritual practice, my choice to stay home and resource this winter
2.5 to 5
- Felt-Sense: Excitement, Craving, ‘Reward’, Seduction, Glamorous, Compulsive
- Leads to: Bingeing, Distraction, Guilt, Regret, Emptiness, Shame
- Tips: This one is tricky, because on the surface it feels like the road to pleasure (and - therefore - can be mistaken for a ‘10’ on your joy meter). However, there is no true pleasure here, it is ‘reward seeking’ behavior that inevitably chews us up and spits us out. This is usually in response to our ‘0’ to ‘2.5s’. Meaning, we get so sick of being so controlled, conforming, and doing everything for everyone else that we need to ‘blow off some steam’. When you look at this door, think of one thing and one thing only: LIE. She will tell you whatever you need to hear to forget how shitty you felt the last time you went here. Just don’t believe her. It will NEVER be different. Good news! If you don’t make these decisions, they actually become 7.5’s on your joy meter and lead you to satisfaction and fulfillment!
- EXAMPLES of 2.5’s: my decision to move to Spain, alcohol, nicotine, shopping, drugs, ‘big moves’ to escape, sugar, meaningless sex; especially when compulsive or indulging more than we meant to (or want to). I will have a whole blog post on this binge/purge cycle and how to get out of it next week
0 to 2.5
- Felt Sense: ‘Fuck No’, deadening, controlled, constricting, punishing
- If made, these decisions lead to: Resentment, Despair, Grief, Loss of Self, Sickness, Victimhood (however, if you listen to your ‘fuck no’ and DON’T follow this false trail, you will be led to POWER, HEALTH, VITALITY, and ALIGNMENT - which is essentially equal to a ten on your joy meter because you are setting a boundary!)
- Tips: If you are making a decision to AVOID FEAR, you are going the wrong way. This zone is very alluring, because it is usually based on logic, rationale, reason, and what’s expected of you. Hanging out here for too long usually results in the compulsive decisions of the ‘2.5 to 5’ range. This is also where we run to when we feel the guilt of our binge (This is the realm of the purge). This is also the realm of the patriarchy / societal conditioning.
- EXAMPLES: People-pleasing, outdated routines, following the herd, dogma, rhetoric, soul sucking jobs that we happen to be good at, keeping up with the Jones’, approval seeking, other people’s definitions of success, perfectionism, overwork, carrying others’ burdens, trying to do it all ourselves, ‘figuring it out’, my decision NOT to go live in Greece after college (because I was scared)

Here’s a very professional diagram of what I am talking about.

So, here’s your Inner Shaman practice this week: Use your Joy Meter. And use the tips I gave you above to identify the dead ends that are disguised as the mecca:

<DO NOT GO HERE>.

(oh, but if you do, forgive yourself, cus it’s just a game and its creator loves you no. matter. what. and you can’t actually make a ‘wrong turn’ cus all roads lead back to Source eventually)

Then comment below, what can you use this on in your life right now to make the sovereign choice in line with your highest and best?

xoSteffie